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Warning: Distressing content
The family of Logan Steinwede, a 20-year-old surfer who took his own life in November, have revealed the heartbreak that has followed his unexpected death.
Logan’s uncle, Dr Justin Coulson, is a parenting expert and psychologist and revealed that his nephew was a “super happy kid” on the verge of turning professional in surfing.
The family says it had no prior indication or hint about Logan’s mental health. His loved ones are still struggling to understand the reasons behind the tragedy.
Dr Coulson, who frequently surfed with Logan, said there was no clear trigger for Logan’s death. The family has been grappling with the unthinkable loss during the Christmas period.
Logan left a note before his death, expressing “love and sadness”, but Dr Coulson believes he may not have fully grasped the impact his death would have on his loved ones.
“Logan was a super happy kid and on the cusp of turning professional,” Dr Coulson said via the Courier Mail.
“Nobody in the family had any hint it was coming. We can draw a line through a whole lot of things, but as for a trigger, we just don’t know.
“But I don’t think he had any concept of how much sadness his death would cause.”
Dr Coulson said the highly complex topic of suicide will always be difficult to fully understand.
“People fundamentally believe that they’re helping everyone around them by not being here – they don’t have to convince themselves, they are convinced,” he said.
“Secondly, they have tunnel vision. I have spoken to several people who have survived and they all talk about how grateful they are now, but at the time they truly believed suicide was not only the only solution but also the best solution.
“Thirdly, life gets too heavy. Your life is like a bucket; you pick up rocks as you go through and eventually it overflows.”
Logan’s mother, Karina Foran, described him as “fearless and impulsive” and admitted that life is now “really bad” for the family.
She had a strong bond with her son and said she would trade her own life to have him back in a heartbeat.
“Logan was fearless and impulsive and maybe there was something that was missed – you run around a million times in your head and it’s f***ed up,” she said.
“We had an amazing bond and talked about everything together; Logan knew how much he was loved, so his death is earth-shattering.
“I would do anything to change the outcome – I would trade my life to get his back.”
Mrs Foran’s husband, Gold Coast Titans footballer Kieran Foran, has been supportive, but she stressed that nothing can replace the part of her that is now missing.
She called upon parents to cherish and love the challenging aspects of parenting, as those are the things missed the most after a loss.
“If anyone was down, flat or sad, he repelled that energy and made them smile,” she continued.
“He would be spewing that everyone is crying oceans of tears for him; that would be torture for him.”
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